Thursday, November 12, 2009

Guilt isn't Sexy

Even when I am not carrying my 25-lb Toddler around, I am still lugging a heavy sack of guilt. All moms do it, which is why we always walk lopsided. I wish I could blame Darling Husband for this baggage, but it is all me. I feel like I have to hide any moment in the day that I take for myself. When DH comes home with, "So, what did you do today?" I quickly rattle off the scads of things I crossed off my list and never mention the two pages of my very overdue library book that I snuck in.
SAHM's get a reputation for having this really easy life that revolves around drunken story times and watching shirtless gardeners weed wack the yard. I promise you that isn't is much too cold in November to make them take their shirts off. But we feel like we need to prove how hard "staying home" really is to the detriment of all else.
Even if I set aside time to read or get a pedi, I can't focus or enjoy it because the Nagging Mother in me is criticizing the waste of time and money.
"How nice that your toes are painted Black Cherry Chutney--they will look splendid against the giant piles of smooshed food and dirty clothes all over the floors at home."
But feeling constantly worn down and haggard and intellectually depleted doesn't do anymore for the ego than the black guilt, so today's Sexy Naptime is to really, truly have some Guilt-Free Mama time.
The magic in this is that Mamas are fabulous multi-taskers. It does ease some pressure if you have a load in the dryer, dinner in the crock pot and wine in the chiller.
I had the sitter take Baby Boy for the morning so I could clean the house without him "helping" and once that was done, took a fabulously indulgent hour to eat peanut butter and catch up on Tom Kat and Brangelina, and there ain't nothing wrong with that.

1 comment:

  1. You're a goddess. Does DH know this? If not, slap him Cher style and let him know. :)