I was at a teachers' conference today and during the break about 200 women rushed to use the 3 stalls. After an 18-minute wait, I was blind with the urge, rushed in and peed.
It wasn't until I turned to kick the flusher that I saw a bottle of Astroglide perched in glistening (and grostesquely unexplained) glory on the back of the toilet.
I saw the handful of women that had gone prior to me. All entered and left without a handsome and out-of-breath man, thus for the rest of the day my imagination (on a mission without my approval) cruelly explored what other tasks that purple bottle has been required to handle.
I should get some sympathy extra-credit for that.