You tell yourself not to, but your fingers ignore you as they slide open the bedside drawer exposing the dirty side of the people that pay you $4.00/hr to watch their children.
Jump to today. I had my sitter come over so I could go to the grocery store without Baby Boy grabbing everything in site and chucking it at passersby.
It occurred to me on Isle 7 that "OMG, what if she is going through MY drawer?"
As soon as I got home I ran upstairs and looked at my room as if I was her. Very pretty and clean--but focus on my night stand: 8 books that I either started and didn't like or have been telling myself (for years) to read; ancient alarm clock I have had since 1993 (That Sony won't die!), a bottle of massage oil so thick with greasy dust that I immediately toss it and a tube of Bio Freeze, a god send for one who carries a 24 lb toddler around; Bag Balm and plain Chapstick.
Christ I'm 65.
Opening the drawer, I am horrified that the expired lube has cracked open and soaked my Passport with 2 oz of water-based Her Pleasure. There are other things that shimmy and shake, but have been neglected along with a few blurry love letters (also violated with KY) and broken reading glasses.
Dump. It. All.
Today's Sexy Naptime: Making Over the Naughty Drawer. This will have to be in two parts since I can't hop off to the sexy shop today. But at least it isn't sticky now.
When you get home, go through your drawer and get rid of all the crap.
I need to get back that sex kitten that loved shopping for the newest toys and stealing batteries from the remotes in order to try them.
More on this tomorrow. Now I have to call and get my Passport reissued.