Thursday, May 20, 2010

Sexy Lead Toys

We have these new neighbors--they have grandkids my age, so you do the math. These are the same neighbors we stalk whenever they have the Big Orange Trucks working in their yard. (

They came over on Sunday with a bag for Baby Boy.

"This isn't a gift," the man clarified. "We found these trucks in our basement when we moved--hell, they must be 40-years old. You make the call if they are safe."

(Translation: We found these old pieces of crap after we had made all the dump runs we planned on,'s his birthday around now isn't it?)

Before I could do the Death Toy inspection, BB had ripped open the bag and the clanging of metal parts hit the floor.

Strike One.

He won't let these newfound gems go. As I follow him around wondering how much of the lead paint he is inhaling or upon what jagged edge he had punctured a lung, I imagine the couple smiling to each other knowing they have found a way to keep us out of their yard.

As least until I file a lawsuit.

1 comment: